Friday, July 17, 2009

Novak's Last Theory, Part 5: Those We've Left Behind

"Why choose me?"

"Well, you know how Gomes and Carter are," I say, "and Matiba doesn't really talk. He just psychoanalyzes."

Mori smiles faintly. "That's him alright." She's lying halfway into a service tunnel, splicing electrical cables.

"And you're the easiest to convince."

She slides out, wipes a sleeve across her sweat-streaked face. "Oh?"

I recite her secret. One she told me on a previous day to use as proof. Her face is a mix of mortification and amusement.

"That's a lie," she says quickly. "...but one that only I could have told you."

We talk as she works, moving around the engine room. I mention the boy. My fear that I might be going mad. She listens thoughtfully, with the occasional "hmmm" or clarifying question.

"I've spent most of the day searching for him. But now I'm more afraid of finding him than of not."

She looks up from the screen she's analyzing, seems to weigh me with her eyes. "I don't think you're going crazy." She shrugs. "Sometimes true learning surprises us when it emerges."

Mori always has a Taoist nugget for me in these conversations. Of course, she's not too serene to cry during closing ceremony. But then, she left a kid on Oloreth too.

She catches the drifting look in my eye. Puts a hand on my arm. "Don't think about them." She swallows. "It only makes it worse."

***

I search the rest of the afternoon, but without any luck. I've given up, and am heading to the bridge for closing, when suddenly there he is, standing right in the hall. He smiles, and motions for me to follow him. We trace a circuitous route through the ship and into the crew stasis room. He stops in front of an empty bed, the crylate dome yawning open, and points, looking at me significantly.

"Yes, that's my bed," I say, "I'm Novak." I pat my chest and repeat it. "Novak."

He pats his own chest and works up his lips. "Nwo-vock."

So I've got a little mimic. I smile at him. "Yes, very good. What's your name?"

"Nwovock," he repeats, beaming, and starts to climb into my bed, poking at the mattress.

He doesn't understand.

The ship begins rumbling as we enter the upper atmosphere. A shadow passes across the boy's face. I sit down on the bed next to him, trying to look cheerful. But with the first big pocket of turbulence I can see that he's terrified. I realize he knows what's coming.

"You remembered me from yesterday. You remember."

Another hit. The boy crawls into my lap, cowering. I hesitate, then wrap my arms around him. He feels as real as anything. Can't be more than five years old. He's about the same size as my youngest, Leah. I think back to the last time I held her. She was crying. Begging me not to go. I told her I would be back in no time.

Mori's right. It only makes it worse.


[Jump to part 6: The Nascent and the Ancient.]

3 comments:

  1. Wow, having Novac know a secret and repeat it on the next "day" to Mori is really cool! And now I'm hooked on the whole boy story! Way to go!

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  2. Thanks babeness! You're such an encouragement. And thank you for putting up with me this month as I dump all my free time into writing. I really appreciate you.

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  3. So, maybe the boy is Novac.....
    As Novac keeps repeating the past, maybe he get's launched into some lessened version of himself.
    This is John's latest theory.
    Maybe, I should write a story-- a story based on theories explaining your story...
    (hmm-- interesting)....

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